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Monday, 8 January 2018

Dear LIB readers; 'I hit a woman but I want to know if I was justified' - LIB reader writes

Dear LIB readers;

Below is an email sent in by a LIB reader...
Dear Linda straight to it..I was walking behind my mom yesterday in the market. For those of us who are in Lagos you know how busy Lagos Island market is. I intentionally made her walk in front of me so I can always have her in my sight. It happened that as we walked past a particularly narrow walkway my moms shoulders mistakenly brushed that of another girl. My mom is much bigger than the girl so she was knocked off balance a bit.. I could not believe that immediately the girl regained her footing she retraced her steps and shoved my mom to the ground. She was oblivious to the fact that we (my mom and i) were walking together.. Immediately I observed the above scenario play out in front of me I didn't know when I raised my hand and gave this girl a resounding slap that she fell into the gutter. This girl was wearing a hijab and so before you knew it a couple of 'alfas' started gathering aggressively asking me why I slapped their 'sister'. They started shoving me and it took the intervention of some passersby who saw the whole drama play out to avoid me being lynched by the growing mob.
Anyway i am writing you because the whole drama made me think.  I have always held the opinion that there is absolutely no excuse for a man to hit a woman. In fact immediately I hit her I was filled with a  deep sense of remorse considering the force of the slap and the extent of injury she sustained. But the mere sight of my mother on the ground made me act on reflex. I doubt if any amount of self control would have made me act otherwise. If it were a man I probably would have followed the slap with some blows. I am not a violent person.. Far from it. But something snapped yesterday and it has made me doubt a lot I think I knew about myself.  The deed was done and as powerful as my resolves were they didn't seem to help me when I was faced with the reality..
I want others to read this and advise me  what I could have done better..Or is it possible to provoke someone to a point where they do things they would later regret?  Note that I am about getting married to a girl I dated from University for 3 years and I can never dream of hitting her. Thanks


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